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Letter: Translating Andrew Scheer

Writer has fun interpreting quotes from Conservative leader
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According to ‘www.brainyquote.com,’ Andrew Scheer made the following statements. For your enlightenment, I have attempted to interpret the messages behind the political spin.

Andrew Scheer said, “Some people say I smile too much.” Translation: He doesn’t realize his supercilious smiling makes him look foolish, but instead believes it makes him look coolish.

Andrew Scheer said, “The Conservative party under my leadership will continue to be an inclusive, welcoming party that welcomes not only immigrants but also refugees, and ensures that Canada plays its role in welcoming people from difficult situations.” Translation: He will welcome right-wing Conservative radicals from the eight corners of the world.

Andrew Scheer said, “I’m not terribly science-y. I couldn’t tell you what’s the binomial equation or how many atoms in a mole.” Translation: He doesn’t understand the real world and doesn’t want to learn. That’s why he went into politics.

Andrew Scheer said, “I support the need for Canada to play a significant role in reducing global emissions.” Translation: Because carbon is widely used to filter pollutants out of water, he believes pulverized coal could be added to gasoline to filter out harmful vehicle exhaust emissions, including carbon dioxide.”

Lloyd Atkins